Further Clarity: Mother didn't talk about abuse

In response to this post, someone wrote:

Thank you for sharing your story in response to mine!

I have a feeling my mother was molested by my grandfather as well. Since I was never allowed to talk about be molested, nor have any feelings regarding it either, it was never discussed. Instead, my mother, who was always hard on me, became abusive.

Years later, as an adult and trying to deal with everything, I asked my grandmother if my grandfather had molested my mother; she denied it and said not that she knew of. However, this same grandmother knew what my grandfather was doing to me and did nothing to stop him.I will never know the truth. My family prefers things that way; pretend something didn't happen, rather than face it and allowing healing to take place.

For peace in my life, I cut ties with my mom many, many years ago when I moved out on my own and she turned on my dad. Then years later, my getting help strained the relationship that was already difficult between my dad and me. I wasn't out to blame anyone or make him feel guilty (for not protecting me), instead I wanted all of us to be able to heal.

In the long run I feel like a stronger person; the healing wasn't easy and it's a continual process but at least I've faced the abuses and the repercussions of both of them, and I will continue to do so as I need to.

Thank you for this blog, Mary! Sharing stories, feelings, thoughts, and more can be healing! Reading all of these bring up a lot of memories, and thoughts about my abuses, but in a good way.